A Writer to the Movies – RoboCop (2014)

Robocop-2014-closeupThis is exactly the kind of movie Hollywood wants: a convoluted mess full of plot-holes, unnecessary subplots, bad direction and little fun to be had.

Let’s go in order over the points I just mentioned, shall we?


The most infuriating ones are tied to the RoboCop character who, by the way, only starts actually doing something 50 minutes in the movie.

They go too deep in how RoboCop works and how OGP can control him and shut him down whenever they want. But when RoboCop rebels the first time, Gary Oldman’s character is asked why and his line is literally ‘I have no idea’. This could have been acceptable only if they didn’t go so much into detail before.

In the original RoboCop they don’t explain how Murphy starts regaining his memories. It’s left to the viewer’s imagination, just like the whole process of creating him was. But if you start going into that much detail about something, you can’t suddenly go ‘I have no idea’. That’s called a cop-out.

Robocop-2014-trailerAnd the worse thing is that it happens twice. The second and most important time when RoboCop manages to do something that goes against his programming, they never explain why, nor were any hints given for us to make our own idea. It just comes out of nowhere.

Another blatant plothole is this system that they implant into RoboCop which basically has access to all the digital archives of the police, crosses evidence, and tells him who to arrest. Which begs the question: why didn’t they give the police this system to begin with, in a Computer?

If OGP in this movie just wanted good PR, that looks like a good and hugely cheaper start, since they stated that making RoboCop cost them billions.

Robocop-2014-Movie-PosterAnd on top of it, this system makes RoboCop look even less intimidating that he already is. In this version, he is less bulky and moves like a human would.

Also, RoboCop was needed not because the police didn’t do their work properly, but because they had little resources and more often than not died before arresting someone. The problem was the overwhelming violence.

This movie makes it appear like RoboCop is only needed because he has that program in his brain. It makes all the other policemen look like idiots, and it makes him even less intimidating than he already is.

robocop-20141Unnecessary Subplots

The most unnecessary is Murphy’s family. They have fifteens minutes of screen-time and they add nothing to the plot. You could remove them from the movie, put his colleague in place of his wife in that one scene, and nothing would be lost or change.

The one that made me the most angry was the one that was interesting and goes nowhere.

The first five minutes of the movie are more interesting than anything else that happens afterwards. Surprisingly, they seem to retain the spirit of the original movie. I would have much preferred to see RoboCop in that contest. But as I said, it goes nowhere. And that’s a damn waste.

RoboCop-2014-oped-RoboCop-3Bad Direction

There’s so much shaky cam in this movie that I almost got nausea.

It ruins every single action scene in this movie. In the very first one there are cuts where I couldn’t tell what is going on at all. Who got injured, why, how, where did they shoot this guy from!

It’s even more aggravating when they use it in scenes where people are just standing in front of each other talking! There’s no action to make ‘more dramatic’. There’s no need for shaky cam!

RoboCopAnd that’s not the only questionable directing choice. There’s an action scene in the second half of the movie where I literally had no idea what was going on from start to end because on top of the shaky cam, you have another bad directing choice that also makes no sense plot-wise.

But never is the bad direction as evident as it is in Samuel L. Jackson. Michael Keaton gives a great performance, Gary Oldman gives an okay performance, Samuel L. Jackson seems to not give a flying snake about the movie he’s starring in.

That’s half on him, and half on the director who, I guess, was intimidated by his star power and never bothered to correct him.

robocop-2014-nuova-armaturaLittle Fun

The movie is just no fun at all to watch. The fight scenes aren’t fun because you can’t follow them properly. There are very few jokes, and those that exist are not exactly funny. The plot is a mess.

Worst of all, the characters are not entertaining. No bad performances in this movie, but there sure are boring performances. Michael Keaton’s character has that potential to entertain, but the script gives him almost nothing to work with.

Joel Kinnaman is no joke either. His character is not well written to begin with, but even before transforming into RoboCop, he’s so inexpressive! No matter if he’s making a weapon deal undercover, playing with his son or making out with his wife, he always has the same expression.

robocop23When he puts on the suit his face’s lack of expression becomes even more evident, and his body language is not intimidating at all. Again, half of this falls on the director’s shoulders. If you really wanted to make this RoboCop have emotions, make sure he emotes them well.

I know it’s not an easy role, but we have lots of examples of people giving a great performance even with some kind of disadvantage. Like Marlee Matlin in Children of a Lesser God, Hugo Weaving in V for Vendetta, and of course, Peter Weller in the original RoboCop.

OurRobocopRemakeFinal Thoughts

I wouldn’t suggest going to see this. People who aren’t fans of the original will find it boring, and people who are fans of the original will come out of the movie theater infuriated and with their stomachs lurching.

If you really want to see a fun movie based on the original RoboCop, I suggest watching ‘Our Robocop Remake’ at OurRobocopRemake.Com. A joined effort from 50 groups of people to make a fitting homage to the original movie.

It’s completely free, it’s very funny and it’s many times more entertaining than this Robot Bore Fest.

About Meinos Kaen

Meinos Kaen is the secret author identity of one Simone Simeone, born and raised in Italy since anno domini 1988. You’ll never find a person with a harder accent to pin to a precise geographical location, be it Italian or English he’s speaking. God help us all if he ever manages to actually learn Japanese.
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6 Responses to A Writer to the Movies – RoboCop (2014)

  1. Pingback: Saturday Double Feature: Robocop (2014) and… « Durnmoose Movie Musings

  2. TenshinG says:

    Hey Meinos Kaen I like to know why you drop the Naruto manga, it’s mostly curiosity that bugs me and also I like to hear your opinion the story

    • Meinos Kaen says:

      Sadly, it’s because it has become a cheesy, unoriginal, boring piece of manga poison. It’s not funny or exciting anymore to me. I’m just waiting for it to end so that I can close this chapter in my life while I move to better and greener pastures, like Iron Knight and D-Frag.

      • TenshinG says:

        Hmm I could snap right now but . . . I like to know why you find it unoriginal, boring and manga poison. Like backup the information.

        since when was Cheesy a bad thing?

      • Meinos Kaen says:

        When the manga didn’t begin as cheesy. Anyway, this isn’t the place to discuss this.

  3. TenshinG says:

    True want to discuss this in FanFiction or you rather give your answer in a made article?

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